awkwardisoverrated

So today I started my new role today.  It was good, as much as I would love to be inputting into the lives of women and children in terms of where I want my career in God has put me in this place for now.  Doing a task, that can be repetitive and boring but is meant to teach me some stuff that I need to learn.  Being in charge of stock although small in terms of the dreams God has put on my heart, I have come to the realization that it's in preparation for where I will be going in due season.  When I think about it the role is vital in the running of the store, if there's no stock then there's nothing to sell, no profit for the company and workers in it and no income for many people and families.  It can be applied to any role really, it's not like I'm going to work everyday without purpose, it has one not just the one I thought I'd be fulfilling in my age that I'm now.  I really think God has set this massive dream on my heart which scares me because I don...

This year has been crazy to say the least.  Sometimes I've felt like I've been so on my own and confused about what's gone on.  Especially in the realm of work & relationships.  A lot of stuff has happened, too much for me to all put down on paper.  Relationships have changed and some have been lost as life would have it more like God would have it.  I'm a stubborn person by nature, and as you can tell by my past entries I like to think my life is controlled by me, especially when it comes to love.  Ha ha is all I can say now cause at this point in time, nothing at all is happening in that regard for me and it's funny cause I'm okay with it.  I'll have a bad day when all I want to do is be listened to and hugged, but then those feelings fade once I look back at how much God has done for me and continues to do for me.  Love will come in due time and like Tori Kelly says it'll be worth the wait.  Really determined not to waste anymore time ...

This weekend was good, like really good with my family.  Work was fun and good too, it's like nothing can all be going right at the same time.  It sucks not that I was looking for something to go wrong but for the most part life's not perfect this is why I have Jesus.  When I think about it, I have to force myself to not get upset, I'm not angry or annoyed by anyone but myself.  I tried, and seemed to have failed again, times like this I just want my mum.  I just want her here reassuring me that everything's not as bad as it seems and that there's plenty of fish in the sea like she used to say.  I remember before she left she told me that she knew someone would come along for me in due time it just hasn't happened yet.  I wish it had but it hasn't and it sucks, not that I'm complaining, much, but sometimes when Tori Kelly sings most of her songs she's speaking about my life.  LOL all in my head would have to be my life right now as well as Dear No...

This last weekend was busy, extremely busy with our fundraiser ptl we did pretty well and we're one step closer to achieving our financial goal of being able to pay for accommodation & transport for our campuses retreat.  Hopefully and believing we can do so much more with the money raised that God multiplies what we make for the people we're bringing. So this brings me to how the day went, overall it was chaotic, no excuses I'd say it would be an understatement for me to say I was overwhelmed.  So many voices and so many people needing me on that day it was hard.  Obviously not doing something like this I was in new territory, I've always had the comfort of having someone physically being there to kind of hide behind but I had no option to do this and ptl we got most of our plates sold.  As well as the other fundraiser we were doing, totally thankful for the girls I had on the team they were lifesavers as well as an older lady that fully had my back that whole...