What my weak arm taught me
This past month I injured myself so gracefully at work.
Little to my knowledge it was worse then what I thought. I tend to get a sore neck every fortnight so thought it was the same thing. Wake up the following Monday after the Thursday (I hurt it) and couldn't really move it. The tingling then started in my arm, on the Tuesday & on my lips. Was a fun experience especially cause I'm super dramatic naturally about things, but reluctantly decided to see the doctor. The first doctor told me I couldn't do much & prescribed proper posture, and inflammatories. I wasn't super satisfied with this so I called Healthline. This was because the tingling wouldn't subside (thought I was dying LOL). Went to another doctor who diagnosed me with a shoulder & neck sprain, and referred me for physio. I was happier with this.
Went to physio & took inflammatories still no real relief from the pain. I was frustrated with this, cause I like all of us do want the solution straight away. This did not happen & much to my annoyance & frustration while doing physio too I was referred to get an ultra sound. My physio couldn't work out what was happening so off I went & got a X-ray too.
All while this has been happening, its been 5 weeks & my anger and frustration grew as time went on. I prayed and waited, like come on God do you not want to heal me? Funnily enough but so God He's taught me that it's the process of the wait that He's working. How often do we put God in a box or we pray for the outcomes we want without actually drawing into God & what He's doing in what we're currently struggling through. This was and continues to be (but graciously & kindly He's still shown up). I also have had to rest & wear a sling throughout this journey & that has really exposed my control issues with God. I learnt that I don't like looking weak, I was still holding onto control in many issues of my life & it's been a journey of the not knowing & waiting that has pushed me more into God.
All things I would not have learnt had I just gotten healed straight away like I wanted. Even though I still don't know what the plan is moving forward with my shoulder. I may not even get healed from it, cause ultimately that's up to God (which now I'm good with), I trust that this current circumstance has taught me deeper dependency on God, trusting in God's sovereignty & not compartmentalising Him & finally patience. It's also shown me how to now relate to people that don't get the healing & suffer daily from physical pain. These lessons have also been applicable to other areas of my life which I'm super grateful for.
So if you're like me and are waiting on healing. Wondering where God is in it? I encourage you to look deeper (past the pain) & I hope you'll find that He's right in the middle of it.
God loves you sooooooooooo much!
xoxox
Kerri
Little to my knowledge it was worse then what I thought. I tend to get a sore neck every fortnight so thought it was the same thing. Wake up the following Monday after the Thursday (I hurt it) and couldn't really move it. The tingling then started in my arm, on the Tuesday & on my lips. Was a fun experience especially cause I'm super dramatic naturally about things, but reluctantly decided to see the doctor. The first doctor told me I couldn't do much & prescribed proper posture, and inflammatories. I wasn't super satisfied with this so I called Healthline. This was because the tingling wouldn't subside (thought I was dying LOL). Went to another doctor who diagnosed me with a shoulder & neck sprain, and referred me for physio. I was happier with this.
Went to physio & took inflammatories still no real relief from the pain. I was frustrated with this, cause I like all of us do want the solution straight away. This did not happen & much to my annoyance & frustration while doing physio too I was referred to get an ultra sound. My physio couldn't work out what was happening so off I went & got a X-ray too.
All while this has been happening, its been 5 weeks & my anger and frustration grew as time went on. I prayed and waited, like come on God do you not want to heal me? Funnily enough but so God He's taught me that it's the process of the wait that He's working. How often do we put God in a box or we pray for the outcomes we want without actually drawing into God & what He's doing in what we're currently struggling through. This was and continues to be (but graciously & kindly He's still shown up). I also have had to rest & wear a sling throughout this journey & that has really exposed my control issues with God. I learnt that I don't like looking weak, I was still holding onto control in many issues of my life & it's been a journey of the not knowing & waiting that has pushed me more into God.
All things I would not have learnt had I just gotten healed straight away like I wanted. Even though I still don't know what the plan is moving forward with my shoulder. I may not even get healed from it, cause ultimately that's up to God (which now I'm good with), I trust that this current circumstance has taught me deeper dependency on God, trusting in God's sovereignty & not compartmentalising Him & finally patience. It's also shown me how to now relate to people that don't get the healing & suffer daily from physical pain. These lessons have also been applicable to other areas of my life which I'm super grateful for.
So if you're like me and are waiting on healing. Wondering where God is in it? I encourage you to look deeper (past the pain) & I hope you'll find that He's right in the middle of it.
God loves you sooooooooooo much!
xoxox
Kerri
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