What a year!
Hey so haven't posted in so long! last one was July its been so hectic but alas I am back! So the years almost done, and it has been crazy this year has been filled with so many ups a few downs but for the most part it's been so good!
This year I got blessed with 2 nephews they are so beautiful! Love them to bits, said goodbye to our family cat which was so sad and also a friend who left overseas to study. Obviously that's the short version of it,theres been so many other things that have gone on that have fully changed & challenged me! I got a new job praise God! part time but I do love it and praying that the hours increase next year! I changed roles at work went from being stock to back on the floor and that has brought its challenges with it. In terms of church, had a change of leadership in our young adults ministry and was so challenged by it, pride got tested and was on the verge of wanting to quit. Nevertheless I got over myself and have actually seen the change as a blessing in disguise. This year has been so full on with my family and it's been great, had a wedding, 2 births, graduation, wedding as well as change in work roles.
It has been good, I feel like God has shown me throughout this year that in all its challenges relationally especially He's my protector and defender. I have been tested in this area so much, and cried about it a lot, but God has always been faithful through it. I've learnt so much this year and am feeling like I'm really at where God wants me. Watched this really good message on being a helpmeet to my husband one day, but also that I'm called to be a helpmeet to those in my world. After that I learnt how to embrace helping others in my world, instead of having a bad attitude about it, still have my moments though. I sometimes as you do in this single season I'm in have found myself thinking bad about myself but got a word put on my heart about that future season, and from then on for the most part have enjoyed this season I'm in instead of enduring it. For a long time I resented it and God for making me wait, but what I've learnt is that regardless of what happens or doesn't God is still God. He's working regardless of whether I see it or not, this has been a challenge as I like evidence based progress. Which is stupid because it's contrary to faith, time after time that I've decided to do something in faith I've never been let down. I had a day when I let anxiety have its way and didn't go somewhere I was meant to & have been justifying my rebellion all day, or kept myself busy to not think about it. None of which has taken away from the disappointment I have felt in myself all day, nevertheless I'm going to get up now and do better. Lesson learnt don't let your feelings get the better of me.
I have also learnt a lot about materialism, the need to learn contentment in what I have. This has been challenging as because of the times we live in. It has really taught me though that my value doesn't come from what I have or even what I do, but from God alone. There was a massive journey with that but I thought I'd save you the novel. Short version, I compared myself a lot to others, and always felt stink about what I had especially after being on social media. Got challenged to fast it for a while, did so and I think really learnt how not to allow of what others share affect the way I view me. I'm untouchable because of Jesus and it's a fact that gets challenged daily every time I open up any of my social media. I guess I had to come to the revelation for myself after hearing it so often and doing it so much myself, that social media is a highlights reel of a life, not the actual life.
I also learnt how to not place my worth in people especially my loved ones. I love them to bits but my worth does not come from pleasing/displeasing them. My job is simple to love them and show them Jesus with skin on regardless of how difficult that is. It's been a long journey, one that I'm still on but so thankful that I'm getting free in this area, because a lot of the time I felt like I had to carry them and sought validation from my family. Whereas God has completely flipped that on it's head, showing me that He's the only one fit to completely love & look after them not me as much as I try.
Overall this year has been amazing and bittersweet at the same time, missing my mum always and going through so many milestones as a family has been hard without her. Nevertheless God has helped us to soldier on, and bring her into everything we have done and will do so in the future without her physically being here with us. Next week is christmas and it will be sad and happy cause it's the babies first christmas, also our 2nd without her. As a family we will include mum and know that she's watching us happy that we're happy and we're all where we're meant to be, as hard as it may seem. I really can't wait to see her again, but determined to make her proud while I'm still here living a life honouring God in everything I do. So grateful mum took us to church and God used her to show Himself through her in her lifetime through her love and heart towards others. A friend of mine told me who also lost their mum, that you never stop missing them, you just get use to not having them around anymore. It's true, so true.
I'm going to end and it will most likely be the last post for the year, whatever your plans are for christmas and the next year. Love and appreciate your loved ones, own where God's put you and don't let the fear or your feelings stand in the way of where God has you or is calling you to be!!
God loves you SOOOOO BIG!
Kerri
xoxox
This year I got blessed with 2 nephews they are so beautiful! Love them to bits, said goodbye to our family cat which was so sad and also a friend who left overseas to study. Obviously that's the short version of it,theres been so many other things that have gone on that have fully changed & challenged me! I got a new job praise God! part time but I do love it and praying that the hours increase next year! I changed roles at work went from being stock to back on the floor and that has brought its challenges with it. In terms of church, had a change of leadership in our young adults ministry and was so challenged by it, pride got tested and was on the verge of wanting to quit. Nevertheless I got over myself and have actually seen the change as a blessing in disguise. This year has been so full on with my family and it's been great, had a wedding, 2 births, graduation, wedding as well as change in work roles.
It has been good, I feel like God has shown me throughout this year that in all its challenges relationally especially He's my protector and defender. I have been tested in this area so much, and cried about it a lot, but God has always been faithful through it. I've learnt so much this year and am feeling like I'm really at where God wants me. Watched this really good message on being a helpmeet to my husband one day, but also that I'm called to be a helpmeet to those in my world. After that I learnt how to embrace helping others in my world, instead of having a bad attitude about it, still have my moments though. I sometimes as you do in this single season I'm in have found myself thinking bad about myself but got a word put on my heart about that future season, and from then on for the most part have enjoyed this season I'm in instead of enduring it. For a long time I resented it and God for making me wait, but what I've learnt is that regardless of what happens or doesn't God is still God. He's working regardless of whether I see it or not, this has been a challenge as I like evidence based progress. Which is stupid because it's contrary to faith, time after time that I've decided to do something in faith I've never been let down. I had a day when I let anxiety have its way and didn't go somewhere I was meant to & have been justifying my rebellion all day, or kept myself busy to not think about it. None of which has taken away from the disappointment I have felt in myself all day, nevertheless I'm going to get up now and do better. Lesson learnt don't let your feelings get the better of me.
I have also learnt a lot about materialism, the need to learn contentment in what I have. This has been challenging as because of the times we live in. It has really taught me though that my value doesn't come from what I have or even what I do, but from God alone. There was a massive journey with that but I thought I'd save you the novel. Short version, I compared myself a lot to others, and always felt stink about what I had especially after being on social media. Got challenged to fast it for a while, did so and I think really learnt how not to allow of what others share affect the way I view me. I'm untouchable because of Jesus and it's a fact that gets challenged daily every time I open up any of my social media. I guess I had to come to the revelation for myself after hearing it so often and doing it so much myself, that social media is a highlights reel of a life, not the actual life.
I also learnt how to not place my worth in people especially my loved ones. I love them to bits but my worth does not come from pleasing/displeasing them. My job is simple to love them and show them Jesus with skin on regardless of how difficult that is. It's been a long journey, one that I'm still on but so thankful that I'm getting free in this area, because a lot of the time I felt like I had to carry them and sought validation from my family. Whereas God has completely flipped that on it's head, showing me that He's the only one fit to completely love & look after them not me as much as I try.
Overall this year has been amazing and bittersweet at the same time, missing my mum always and going through so many milestones as a family has been hard without her. Nevertheless God has helped us to soldier on, and bring her into everything we have done and will do so in the future without her physically being here with us. Next week is christmas and it will be sad and happy cause it's the babies first christmas, also our 2nd without her. As a family we will include mum and know that she's watching us happy that we're happy and we're all where we're meant to be, as hard as it may seem. I really can't wait to see her again, but determined to make her proud while I'm still here living a life honouring God in everything I do. So grateful mum took us to church and God used her to show Himself through her in her lifetime through her love and heart towards others. A friend of mine told me who also lost their mum, that you never stop missing them, you just get use to not having them around anymore. It's true, so true.
I'm going to end and it will most likely be the last post for the year, whatever your plans are for christmas and the next year. Love and appreciate your loved ones, own where God's put you and don't let the fear or your feelings stand in the way of where God has you or is calling you to be!!
God loves you SOOOOO BIG!
Kerri
xoxox
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